Today's post is different from any other post I've ever written. I'm not exactly sure why I feel led to update you on some changes in my life, but I do. Some of you have followed me on my blog over its span of 9 years, some of you were a vital part of my life as we shared the love of stamping and Stampin' Up! together. Whether you've shared with me in the the classes, clubs and get togethers in my home, serving on a design team together, or in person at the fun of convention, you have been loyal friends and supporters. I appreciate you!
I've given hints of medical troubles here and there, but you need the whole picture and I'm ready to tell it. The long story goes back some 30 years when my symptoms began for the first time, and then showed up as occasional flare-ups in following years.
The short story goes back to April, when I ended up in the hospital unable to walk without help. Many horrible things were ruled out, including with certainty, having a stroke. After a week I was sent home without a diagnosis. This has happened before. I am still unable to walk any significant distance (i.e., outside, shopping or errands) without help because of weakness and lack of coordination, which comes and goes.
There was an excellent neurologist at the hospital, and I got some good feedback from her. It was helpful to know that my condition was noted and that I really am sane! However, the lack of a diagnosis and uncertainty of finding a competent local neurologist left me doubtful.
The most I know is that I have a lesion in my brain but they don't know what it is because almost all of the diagnostic tests come back normal. I've had neurologists tell me that they know something affects my brain, they just don't know what it is.
Besides being frequently homebound, I also become completely exhausted easily. If I overdo it one day, I may be able only to barely function the next day.
Believe me, I have sought answers. This has been going on almost 4 months now. Without going into details, at my doctor's recommendation, I have sought to be seen at the Mayo Clinic and Johns Hopkins Hospital. Both times, my insurer approved care but I was denied the opportunity to get an appointment. Mayo gave me no reason, just a form letter. With Johns Hopkins, I was originally denied because I did not have a diagnosis. After further review, I was still denied an appointment with an appropriate physician. I could only ask the appointment clerk at JH who told me the doctor determined there was nothing wrong with me.
OK, so this is what it is. Thankfully, my hope is not in doctors alone, it is in God alone. I appreciate your prayers, most certainly! He is working even when we can't see Him, and I believe that as in the past, this bout of illness may go into remission. I am so grateful that it isn't much much worse!
But more than that, I appreciate your understanding. For those who wish I was still a demonstrator for Stampin' Up! I can only say that I had to re-evalute my commitments and I could no longer keep up with the activities I needed to be involved.
For awhile, I considered giving up stamping altogether. But my family and everyone who knows me is sure that it is stamping that keeps me sane and happy up here in my craft room!
I am blessed to have the love and support and help of my family. Even more blessed by my husband who understands that for me, stamping has been for awhile my "work" that keeps me ever-growing, learning, and trying new things. Blogging gives me a platform to do that.
For those of you that are interested enough to read this, I appreciate it. My purpose in writing this has not been for sympathy, but just to say how much I appreciate the opportunity to stamp and blog. It has always been my desire to share here in an authentic and sincere way. Now you know the current situation. Hopefully you have a better view of why I love to stamp and blog so much!
And how grateful I am for your visits and interaction.
A very happy story coming soon. Here's a big hint!
Find delight in your craft.
Make something beautiful!